In Which I Am Undergoing a Fitful Reassertion of My Masculinity

Every so often, the little vestiges of my masculinity that are left reassert themselves. This is particularly true when it comes to the car; I LIKE taking the car apart and doing things to it and that is how my masculinity appears. (it also shows itself when I am messy, but that is not notable) Lately, this has manifested itself as a desire to replace the Omega/Catera, which is rather dull, with something flashier and more exciting.
Now I don't want anything like a Corvette- nothing says I'm 50 like a Corvette, and it has no back seat- and I don't want anything like a Miata, for similar reasons, and I don't want anything like a Honda Civic with 20 inch rims and a spoiler with its own zip code. Yuck. I don't even lust after anything fragile and voluptuous, like a Lamborghini or, heaven forfend, anything gay like a VW Beetle.
I have found the best car that very few people have ever heard of: which is pictured above, the 1987 Buick Grand National X. I thought of this car because I had an '86 Cutlass once with the 307 and Y carburetor and loved it. It was fast and handled well, and comfortable and roomy and quiet and well made, not like the '93. Now think about it; if you want to get a sporty car- something which will be fast- why not buy the FASTEST PRODUCTION CAR EVER MADE? Especially if it is roomy and comfortable like the old Cutlass, and well put together- and look, it looks just like what Darth Vader would drive. Yes, you will all have to bow down before Cruella Dearest in the GNX. Yarrr!
Nowadays people have trouble putting the words "fast" and "Buick" together, but it's true, once upon a time, Buick made not only fast cars, but the fastest production car made TO DATE. (look it up! It's true!) Now a 1987 model- which was the best, it had the most upgrades and was the most advanced- with an intercooled turbo and so forth- costs about 15-20,000 NOW- almost exactly what they cost new in 1987. Try saying that about any of GM's current products- or even anybody else's products. Plus, it's a large, comfortable car, which is still more than anything anyone can say about any of most of the cars on the road now.
I did, alternatively, consider a GTO but those are made in Australia! Even worse build quality than the Omega, so it must be Yugo-esque. Besides, the GNX is just a better car.
I don't, by the way, particularly want to go faster than I drive now- I ordinarily drive about 75 to work- but the idea of being ABLE to go fast is what appeals to me, and especially the idea of being ABLE to go faster than anyone else. Hell, I may not be richer than you, or better looking, or smarter, or have a better spouse- but my car can kick your car retarded.
It would, truly, be a fitting ride for Cruella Dearest.