What my Birthday looked like

So this was my birthday, which was lots of fun, as you can see. I had several martinis and general good times.

This is the last picture Trey and I took together before we broke up- he went and got a tattoo instead of paying his share of the expenses, and also did the disappear-and-get-drunk act AGAIN so I kicked him out. I can't take this anymore especially while in school. It's too stressful to have to deal with school AND all of his unnecessary drama and stupidity. If he wants to be in a relationship he's going to have to buckle down and do right or forget it. And then Friday night, he lost the phone Saniel gave him while clubbing, so I am thinking, I AM better off out of this. That kind of irresponsibility is not salvageable into a relationship.

But then what do I really want? Overall, I don't like dating, because you have to meet people who are generally icky, and it's generally a lot of work. The parts of dating that I like are the parts where guys bring me presents and then we have hot wild sex. I don't like the part where I have to make a good impression on someone else, and get all fixed up, and watch what I say carefully and all. I think I should just be a whore.

I have been dating- not like, seriously, but just getting out and seeing what's out there, which has not been a huge success but then again, I've only had two dates.

Not bad for such a short time! One chap was all right but even queenier than I am and here I have actual pictures of me wearing a tiara and a feather boa in public, and also I don't think he liked me because I haven't heard from him since, and then the other chap- you know, it all adds up on paper and he's really sweet and kind and considerate and intelligent and interesting and I DON'T WANT HIM TO TOUCH ME. That sux, doesn't it? You meet someone who should be great for you and the physical thing just is NOT there. Sigh. I suppose Ed will have to come down here and take Trey's place. But I still plan on keeping the house at like 55 degrees. So then what will he do?

Trey is living with Alex at the moment and allegedly paying, and then I have to refinance the car to get it out of my name.

I don't know how I feel about this.

On the one hand, of course I am very sad because we spent 6 years together trying to make it work, and both of us worked on it, and I really do love Trey. I will always love him. But that doesn't mean that he's good for me and that we can be together. We are on two very different pathways and we tried to put them together but sometimes that does not happen.

What I am really hoping for is that Trey learns some lesson from this and decides to grow up. It happened to Freddy so it can happen to him too. Perhaps if Trey actually has to take care of himself for a while, then he will understand about not being so difficult. Or not, or he'll learn his lesson and then go with someone else.

Anyway, I watched the Super Bowl with Alex and Daniel and Sailor Moon and Torry and his ?mother? Susan.

Daniel had some kind of football pool going with 10 questions you were supposed to answer- he claimed that one did not have to know anything about football but I read the questions and they were like, who do you think is going to be MVP? What do you think the first play will be, Pass or interference? All I knew is none of the questions could be answered with, "Britney Spears," so I declined to participate. Also I know Daniel well enough to know that even if he doesn't MEAN to do it- he will have engineered the questions so that he can answer them better than anyone else. So I thought no.

Despite the fact that there was no drinking, Sailor Moon said, I have a dancer's body! and offered to show us- No I do NOT want to see, thank you, and then he also waxed eloquent on the subject of Alex's nipples. I want to braid Alex's nipple hairs, he said, or wouldn't it be great if they had cornrows?

Well, it would be FASCINATING, but things that fascinate me are usually bad for the person doing the fascinating, reference: The Wide Bride. I am going to now have to ask Alex often about his nipple corn rows.

O and Torry was admiring some chap's arms in an advertisement and I told him he was having a homo moment, and he objected loudly to this.

I was NOT having a homo moment, he exclaimed.

Dude, you were admiring his arms and saying how big they were. When I gaze at men's body parts and comment on how big they are- definitely a homo moment.

Then I said that if he had any more homo moments Alex could sit next to him instead of me.

All the football players were really cute! Except for the fat ones. I think I'm going to stop making colour-based predictions and now begin to make predictions based on the cuteness of the players. One of the players was named "Plaxico"- why would you name your child "Plaxico?" Do you have a serious obsession with dental hygiene? It sounds like some kind of manufacturer of electric- toothbrushes. "kid friendly, mother approved, your kids will love to brush with the ToonsForTykes electric brush- only from Plaxico! Or perhaps it's a country supposed to stand in for Mexico, but renamed by a really bad writer.

I flew into Plaxico City Airport at 11:30 at night. The fumes from the city's unending traffic hung in my nostrils like the smell of football player underarms. Ahh, Plaxico City. City of Light, City of Night.
Yo quiero pelear con los toros, I told the taxi driver, who was squat and had a mustache that reminded me of uncombed sawdust.
There arrr no more boools een Plaxeecoh, senyor, he sneered.
I shot him with my .38 and dumped the body behind the Plaxico City government compound.

And y'all, Hillary Clinton is CRYING on the campaign trail in an apparent effort to show some other emotion than overweening, Lady MacBeth style ambition?

Two words: Crocodile tears.