How Stressed Is Cruella?
Y'all, Cruella is so stressed from this whole law-school-final crap! Cruella just cannot count how many babies Cruella is going to have to hold to get over it, but a whole lot, so when Cruella comes to your house and asks to hold your baby- that would be why.
Cruella, aren't you smart? Don't you have like, a house full of books and you can use the word "hagiography" in a sentence, and you know what someone from Manchester is called, so why is this so hard?
Because- undergrad finals are, you study a subject for the semester, and you sit down and what's on the final is what you studied that semester, so if you paid attention and did the assignments, you're fine.
Law school, on the other hand, you really have no idea what could appear or what the questions could be about. I would write abotu what happened but the exam period is not quite over so I can't but I am pretty sure I flunked bankruptcy, which is bizarre, because I enjoyed the class, but my nervousness- anyway. I thought there would have been a stay question on there, but there didn't seem to be.
Cruella, what the hell are you talking about?
Well, Ok, fine. This is what a law school final will look like, like for - well, any class, but let's say it's Torts.
Today, Gertrude Stein woke up and she was Ida. She walked to the mailbox to get herself a cup of coffee and then went back, and then she went in all directions. After that, she felt worse, so she went to Kroger's to buy herself an octopus. (note, it's not really Kroger's, it's Kroger, so analyse.) The octopus the store sold her had 6 arms and was quite vicious as a result. She came home and gave the octopus to her 2.3 children to play with. One of the children is 3, one of the children is 5, and the .3 child is 2. Ida went to the pantry, which was located in the fourth dimension through a door she had especially installed in the wall by Sears. When she arrived there, she was attacked by a clump of Daleks, who had mistaken her for a clump of geraniums Doctor Who's evil twin had cloned. She went back into the house and a bag of hammers narrowly missed her, striking a donkey which had materialised there by mistake and landing on the octopus. Ida went to bed without kissing her husband or children good night, who were later taken to Neverland by Michael Jackson disguised as Peter Pan.
So given this factual situation, you're supposed to pull out all the torts and analyse them, or in fact this could be tax law, or contracts, or anything. I don't know if that helps but there you are.
Cruella is just all different kinds of stressed: Cruella is, in fact, so stressed that Cruella :
DOES NOT FEEL LIKE DRINKING
REALLY! NOT EVEN A LITTLE BIT! That is how stressed Cruella is.
Also, I heard a Budweiser advertisement on the radio, and I thought, that sounded good! And I am no longer afraid to ride in the Dismobile. Therefore, I am losing it.
Now I have been doing Things to get over this, like the other day I took a "brake" from bankruptcy to help my friend do his Brakes. That gives you an idea of how I relieve stress. It was actually quite stress relieving since I rather directed and dragged out tools and didn't do too much of the- no wait, I did. Never mind. It was an even-handed endeavour.
Other things I have done recently to relieve stress:
Commit IIED on Alex, and I have a new Plot to do so.
Hold THREE babies at ONCE, that was very stress relieving; Olivia (no dammit, it shouldn't have an h, and I refuse) took pictures of this but Sandi has not yet emailed them to me.
Go to Nashville and cook and see Robin
Garden
Robin does not understand what is really going on. I keep trying to tell him that all law students are unloveable during finals. It's the sheer uncertainty of the thing that is really overwhelming. Robin seems to think this is something I am doing just to be difficult.
No, if it were possible to spontaneously combust, it would have happened. Seriously. All law students are unloveable during finals: a fair number of them are unloveable most of the time, I am thinking of two in particular I just Do. Not. Like., but I am very much trying to control this. There are a lot of things I have NOT said or done. So I am trying not to be Unloveable, but it is hard.
O I have a joke for y'all, courtesy of KaplanJulie!
They said that pigs would fly when we elected our first black president, so 100 days after Obama's inauguration, swine flu.
Ha ha!
What is in Nashville that you always want to go there? asked Dad.
Anyhow two weekends ago I went to Nashville and the highlight for me of going to Nashville (at least the reprintable highlights) is what did I cook. I can also tell you about some other things that happened.
Robin has now decided he should read my blog, since I spend a fair amount of time writing about him on it.
We did some play but not very much and we went and saw the Bicentennial Mall and we went to the used Book store.
Nashville has a MUCH better used bookstore than Atlanta does, and I am thinking of the one Daniel peed in. They even have- get this- FREE books- which, that just excites me no end. Robin we think is not so enamoured of the bookstore, but- there are worse things in life, we think, than the pursuit of knowledge. I did convince him to take a free book which was called "Object Lessons" which had little Bible lessons and was somewhat similar to a book he had given me, which I did read, something about the Holy Spirit I think.
Anyway, have you ever noticed that used book people look funny? The clientele there- and this was not true for all of them, certainly not true for myself and Robin- but a large percentage of them look like they grew up underground or something. They tend to be bulky, glasses wearing, and Kmart shopping.
Now Robin and I have matching t-shirts which say " the problem with socialism is eventually you run out of other people's money" For some reason people only noticed and commented on his.
I bought a whole LOT of books, which he did not seem to like much, and I cooked pork loin with orange sauce, no comatose potatoes but bow-tie pasta with pesto and bow-tie pasta with prosciutto and peas and tacos al pastor (which turned out inedibly spicy) and regular tacos and flourless chocolate cake and asparagus with orange hollandaise sauce.
O and y'all I encouraged Amber to read my blog but I think I will go back and edit one of those entries because I said some things I would- no.
Anyway how did I commit IIED on Alex?
Well months ago I stole some of his clothes as part of a Plot against him. I still have not been able to find anyone else to participate in this Plot though.
Then since it was his birthday I thought I would horrify him by wearing his own clothes.
Alex was agog in horror when I came up the walk. He had totally not expected this turn of events. I did get him two bags of fireworks, which I purchased on the Cruella gift plan which is buy someone something as a gift that they really want and would not purchase for themselves, like I got Dad that aquarium.
I really wish I had pictures of this to show y'all but somehow I think because Alex was so Emotionally Distressed pictures did not get taken. Anyhow this is unlikely to happen again because Alex's clothes are uncomfortable and look stupid. I felt like I was going to have a Forrest Gump moment any minute.
And Alex had a cookout, which we thought was rather lacking in the extremely drunk department, and that was good, and I got him a card which said, In dog years you're dead,
None of the fireworks were actually exploded.
Also, Bob provided us with absinthe, which after having drunk- I do not understand the need for banning it. It's totally impossible to drink enough of the stuff to go mad. It tasted TERRIBLE. And I understand that you are supposed to do all kinds of things- basically like crack- where you pour it over a sugar cube and put the sugar cube in a spoon and then set it on fire and then throw it at someone you don't like- But I think drinking should taste good without a whole lot of bother, right? I mean, you might be drunk, and are certainly headed that way, so the last thing you need is to be folding tab A into slot B and doing the hokey pokey or whatever to get a damn drink. Rum and coke, that's what I say, or Gin and- well, straight over ice.
Absinthe, in case you are curious but your curiosity does not exceed the $60 price tag, tastes like a particularly vile form of licorice.
I will remember this for my teenagers, if I ever catch them drinking underage (yah Cruella! you like LIVED to underage drink! Hypocrite!) I will force them to drink an entire bottle of absinthe in one sitting. It was extremely anise flavoured, plus some additional dimensions of vile, like- seriously!
It was like the Fourth Dimension of Vile.
Well, first I had some straight, which was horrible but- the alcohol taste improved the vileness, actually, then since I/we did not like it, Bob prepared us a drink with it in lemonade, which was EVEN WORSE. There was more of it and the vile taste of it was even more pronounced.
I just do not understand this! The French are famous for drinks- that- taste good? right? Wine, let's start with wine- and then champagne, brandy, Cointreau, various beers, - and then they come up with this, and Pastis, which- I was passed some Pastis once, unsuspecting, and responded by immediately barfing all over the wall. Y'all these are fraternity pranks gone way too far.
I would honestly rather eat a fairly large dead bug than consume any more Absinthe, or even a fairly large live one. It's clearly intended as some sort of punishment.
Diamonds aren't forever, the aftertaste of absinthe is.
Then Ian and Trey Norwood went to a titty bar, which I do not understand the appeal of that. Yes, I know I am not interested in titties but- that's like going to a restaurant where you can smell the food, see the food, but you can't eat the food. That would just get me worked up and anxious, and frustrated. So I talked Alex and Amber into driving me home, because they were going somewhere- Amber's house, although Alex felt the need to be very cagey about this- although I could have stayed in Alex's house and committed all manner of mischief.
Also porn is readily available now, so you can just stay home and watch it and - you know. And titty bars are kinda dank places filled with the kind of musty people who live in their parents' basements and are - see the used book types.
And I want to know why do porn stores always have that weird smell, like- that funk. There's always that weird nasty fug of humidity and staleness and ew. A sort of plastics and bong smell? Cherry ammonia? I dunno.
Cruella, aren't you smart? Don't you have like, a house full of books and you can use the word "hagiography" in a sentence, and you know what someone from Manchester is called, so why is this so hard?
Because- undergrad finals are, you study a subject for the semester, and you sit down and what's on the final is what you studied that semester, so if you paid attention and did the assignments, you're fine.
Law school, on the other hand, you really have no idea what could appear or what the questions could be about. I would write abotu what happened but the exam period is not quite over so I can't but I am pretty sure I flunked bankruptcy, which is bizarre, because I enjoyed the class, but my nervousness- anyway. I thought there would have been a stay question on there, but there didn't seem to be.
Cruella, what the hell are you talking about?
Well, Ok, fine. This is what a law school final will look like, like for - well, any class, but let's say it's Torts.
Today, Gertrude Stein woke up and she was Ida. She walked to the mailbox to get herself a cup of coffee and then went back, and then she went in all directions. After that, she felt worse, so she went to Kroger's to buy herself an octopus. (note, it's not really Kroger's, it's Kroger, so analyse.) The octopus the store sold her had 6 arms and was quite vicious as a result. She came home and gave the octopus to her 2.3 children to play with. One of the children is 3, one of the children is 5, and the .3 child is 2. Ida went to the pantry, which was located in the fourth dimension through a door she had especially installed in the wall by Sears. When she arrived there, she was attacked by a clump of Daleks, who had mistaken her for a clump of geraniums Doctor Who's evil twin had cloned. She went back into the house and a bag of hammers narrowly missed her, striking a donkey which had materialised there by mistake and landing on the octopus. Ida went to bed without kissing her husband or children good night, who were later taken to Neverland by Michael Jackson disguised as Peter Pan.
So given this factual situation, you're supposed to pull out all the torts and analyse them, or in fact this could be tax law, or contracts, or anything. I don't know if that helps but there you are.
Cruella is just all different kinds of stressed: Cruella is, in fact, so stressed that Cruella :
DOES NOT FEEL LIKE DRINKING
REALLY! NOT EVEN A LITTLE BIT! That is how stressed Cruella is.
Also, I heard a Budweiser advertisement on the radio, and I thought, that sounded good! And I am no longer afraid to ride in the Dismobile. Therefore, I am losing it.
Now I have been doing Things to get over this, like the other day I took a "brake" from bankruptcy to help my friend do his Brakes. That gives you an idea of how I relieve stress. It was actually quite stress relieving since I rather directed and dragged out tools and didn't do too much of the- no wait, I did. Never mind. It was an even-handed endeavour.
Other things I have done recently to relieve stress:
Commit IIED on Alex, and I have a new Plot to do so.
Hold THREE babies at ONCE, that was very stress relieving; Olivia (no dammit, it shouldn't have an h, and I refuse) took pictures of this but Sandi has not yet emailed them to me.
Go to Nashville and cook and see Robin
Garden
Robin does not understand what is really going on. I keep trying to tell him that all law students are unloveable during finals. It's the sheer uncertainty of the thing that is really overwhelming. Robin seems to think this is something I am doing just to be difficult.
No, if it were possible to spontaneously combust, it would have happened. Seriously. All law students are unloveable during finals: a fair number of them are unloveable most of the time, I am thinking of two in particular I just Do. Not. Like., but I am very much trying to control this. There are a lot of things I have NOT said or done. So I am trying not to be Unloveable, but it is hard.
O I have a joke for y'all, courtesy of KaplanJulie!
They said that pigs would fly when we elected our first black president, so 100 days after Obama's inauguration, swine flu.
Ha ha!
What is in Nashville that you always want to go there? asked Dad.
Anyhow two weekends ago I went to Nashville and the highlight for me of going to Nashville (at least the reprintable highlights) is what did I cook. I can also tell you about some other things that happened.
Robin has now decided he should read my blog, since I spend a fair amount of time writing about him on it.
We did some play but not very much and we went and saw the Bicentennial Mall and we went to the used Book store.
Nashville has a MUCH better used bookstore than Atlanta does, and I am thinking of the one Daniel peed in. They even have- get this- FREE books- which, that just excites me no end. Robin we think is not so enamoured of the bookstore, but- there are worse things in life, we think, than the pursuit of knowledge. I did convince him to take a free book which was called "Object Lessons" which had little Bible lessons and was somewhat similar to a book he had given me, which I did read, something about the Holy Spirit I think.
Anyway, have you ever noticed that used book people look funny? The clientele there- and this was not true for all of them, certainly not true for myself and Robin- but a large percentage of them look like they grew up underground or something. They tend to be bulky, glasses wearing, and Kmart shopping.
Now Robin and I have matching t-shirts which say " the problem with socialism is eventually you run out of other people's money" For some reason people only noticed and commented on his.
I bought a whole LOT of books, which he did not seem to like much, and I cooked pork loin with orange sauce, no comatose potatoes but bow-tie pasta with pesto and bow-tie pasta with prosciutto and peas and tacos al pastor (which turned out inedibly spicy) and regular tacos and flourless chocolate cake and asparagus with orange hollandaise sauce.
O and y'all I encouraged Amber to read my blog but I think I will go back and edit one of those entries because I said some things I would- no.
Anyway how did I commit IIED on Alex?
Well months ago I stole some of his clothes as part of a Plot against him. I still have not been able to find anyone else to participate in this Plot though.
Then since it was his birthday I thought I would horrify him by wearing his own clothes.
Alex was agog in horror when I came up the walk. He had totally not expected this turn of events. I did get him two bags of fireworks, which I purchased on the Cruella gift plan which is buy someone something as a gift that they really want and would not purchase for themselves, like I got Dad that aquarium.
I really wish I had pictures of this to show y'all but somehow I think because Alex was so Emotionally Distressed pictures did not get taken. Anyhow this is unlikely to happen again because Alex's clothes are uncomfortable and look stupid. I felt like I was going to have a Forrest Gump moment any minute.
And Alex had a cookout, which we thought was rather lacking in the extremely drunk department, and that was good, and I got him a card which said, In dog years you're dead,
None of the fireworks were actually exploded.
Also, Bob provided us with absinthe, which after having drunk- I do not understand the need for banning it. It's totally impossible to drink enough of the stuff to go mad. It tasted TERRIBLE. And I understand that you are supposed to do all kinds of things- basically like crack- where you pour it over a sugar cube and put the sugar cube in a spoon and then set it on fire and then throw it at someone you don't like- But I think drinking should taste good without a whole lot of bother, right? I mean, you might be drunk, and are certainly headed that way, so the last thing you need is to be folding tab A into slot B and doing the hokey pokey or whatever to get a damn drink. Rum and coke, that's what I say, or Gin and- well, straight over ice.
Absinthe, in case you are curious but your curiosity does not exceed the $60 price tag, tastes like a particularly vile form of licorice.
I will remember this for my teenagers, if I ever catch them drinking underage (yah Cruella! you like LIVED to underage drink! Hypocrite!) I will force them to drink an entire bottle of absinthe in one sitting. It was extremely anise flavoured, plus some additional dimensions of vile, like- seriously!
It was like the Fourth Dimension of Vile.
Well, first I had some straight, which was horrible but- the alcohol taste improved the vileness, actually, then since I/we did not like it, Bob prepared us a drink with it in lemonade, which was EVEN WORSE. There was more of it and the vile taste of it was even more pronounced.
I just do not understand this! The French are famous for drinks- that- taste good? right? Wine, let's start with wine- and then champagne, brandy, Cointreau, various beers, - and then they come up with this, and Pastis, which- I was passed some Pastis once, unsuspecting, and responded by immediately barfing all over the wall. Y'all these are fraternity pranks gone way too far.
I would honestly rather eat a fairly large dead bug than consume any more Absinthe, or even a fairly large live one. It's clearly intended as some sort of punishment.
Diamonds aren't forever, the aftertaste of absinthe is.
Then Ian and Trey Norwood went to a titty bar, which I do not understand the appeal of that. Yes, I know I am not interested in titties but- that's like going to a restaurant where you can smell the food, see the food, but you can't eat the food. That would just get me worked up and anxious, and frustrated. So I talked Alex and Amber into driving me home, because they were going somewhere- Amber's house, although Alex felt the need to be very cagey about this- although I could have stayed in Alex's house and committed all manner of mischief.
Also porn is readily available now, so you can just stay home and watch it and - you know. And titty bars are kinda dank places filled with the kind of musty people who live in their parents' basements and are - see the used book types.
And I want to know why do porn stores always have that weird smell, like- that funk. There's always that weird nasty fug of humidity and staleness and ew. A sort of plastics and bong smell? Cherry ammonia? I dunno.
posted by SavageATL at 5:29 PM
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