Joke
So y'all I went to the Alpharetta High Homecoming, because they had something for the dearly departed teachers-
And I was hoping that I would see some of my former students, and then I could tell them a joke, as in, Did y'all think I was dead? I'm still ALIVE, just not here anymore. Did you think someone came up to me and mugged me for my French, as in, I have a gun, give me all your French or I'll shoot you, and then I didn't and they shot me and I died?
Well, I think it's funny.
O and I have another joke, which is, here's the punch line, elle ressemble a un- comment dit-on "backhoe" en Francais?
I haven't been really able to figure out what to do for Halloween. I thought I should be something from Regretsy, for example, a yarny vagina.
MTM did not like this idea.
Don't do anything too weird, she says.
Really. Now y'all know I LIVE for Too Weird. This deeply irked me because you would think after this long, she would have accepted me as her friend, right? or what?
So I said well I wanted to do something cheap and easy (yes I could go as That Girl, that would be weird, or myself, hee) and since I got talked into hosting the party, I need something that I can move round in easily. To pick That Girl up out of the basement.
Why don't you dress up as a cowboy, suggested MTM. I have a hat you can borrow.
I will let the lameness of this idea sink in for y'all. Really? a Cowboy?
It has to be witty, I said, trying to think of how to be nice about this.
You don't always have to be witty, she said.
No. I do too have to always be witty, otherwise I will turn into Alex and - did I tell you the other day at dinner he was expounding on the many uses of 9 in accounting? At length? After I said I was thinking about going as that chap who hijacked the airliner with the juice can with the little lights? Alex gave us a whole list of how 9 is used in accounting.
Fine, next time I'll MAKE UP SOMETHING ABOUT HIM, and see if y'all believe it. He did too do this.
Even Dad thought the cowboy thing was lame, and said exactly such, so there.
I did come up with an outfit but you'll have to come if you want to see it.
O and here's an exchange I need to have:
me complaining: I want to lie on the floor and shriek like Maria Callas
respondent: You wanted to be a lawyer
Me thinking: you wanted to be a fuckwit and have clearly achieved that goal.
And I was hoping that I would see some of my former students, and then I could tell them a joke, as in, Did y'all think I was dead? I'm still ALIVE, just not here anymore. Did you think someone came up to me and mugged me for my French, as in, I have a gun, give me all your French or I'll shoot you, and then I didn't and they shot me and I died?
Well, I think it's funny.
O and I have another joke, which is, here's the punch line, elle ressemble a un- comment dit-on "backhoe" en Francais?
I haven't been really able to figure out what to do for Halloween. I thought I should be something from Regretsy, for example, a yarny vagina.
MTM did not like this idea.
Don't do anything too weird, she says.
Really. Now y'all know I LIVE for Too Weird. This deeply irked me because you would think after this long, she would have accepted me as her friend, right? or what?
So I said well I wanted to do something cheap and easy (yes I could go as That Girl, that would be weird, or myself, hee) and since I got talked into hosting the party, I need something that I can move round in easily. To pick That Girl up out of the basement.
Why don't you dress up as a cowboy, suggested MTM. I have a hat you can borrow.
I will let the lameness of this idea sink in for y'all. Really? a Cowboy?
It has to be witty, I said, trying to think of how to be nice about this.
You don't always have to be witty, she said.
No. I do too have to always be witty, otherwise I will turn into Alex and - did I tell you the other day at dinner he was expounding on the many uses of 9 in accounting? At length? After I said I was thinking about going as that chap who hijacked the airliner with the juice can with the little lights? Alex gave us a whole list of how 9 is used in accounting.
Fine, next time I'll MAKE UP SOMETHING ABOUT HIM, and see if y'all believe it. He did too do this.
Even Dad thought the cowboy thing was lame, and said exactly such, so there.
I did come up with an outfit but you'll have to come if you want to see it.
O and here's an exchange I need to have:
me complaining: I want to lie on the floor and shriek like Maria Callas
respondent: You wanted to be a lawyer
Me thinking: you wanted to be a fuckwit and have clearly achieved that goal.
posted by SavageATL at 3:22 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home