Friday, October 12, 2012

Halloween Costume Ideas

I'm threatening to have a Halloween party again, cos, I have like, lots of extra time, and space in my house to do this. Not. I am so sick of my "office" being all over the house. It is in the living room, dining room, and bedroom. Cruella, why don't you move? Cos I cannot get financing, which I think is stupid. I'm hoping, after I file taxes in 2013, I can get financing and then move, but the other problem is that all the houses are being bought up. Except yours. Except mine! So really, I just want to dress up and act up. So I was going to tell y'all about Halloween costume ideas; I already posted what I thought was cute to facebook which was the Ladies of Lichtenstein, Picasso, and Warhol. Then another idea is you could be an Allegory; I think Hope has pretty much been ruined . . . Cruella, what is an allegory? An allegory is the personification of an idea, more or less. I'm not going to even try to defend the precision of that definition, but you could dress up as Ambition, or Charity, or Faith, or . . . Cruelty or Wantonness would be fun. Why don't you cut straight to the point and dress up as Alcoholism? Cos then people would say "Where's your costume?!" Ha ha. Which leads me to another idea, which is you could be the personification of your favourite drink, like you could dress up as a Cosmopolitan, or a Martini, or bourbon, or kentucky moonshine . . . Huh. Or if you are really fat, and I know a couple of people like this, you could dress up as the Budget Deficit. I did the Masque of the Red Death several times so I'm ready for a new costume. But literary Characters are always good. And I haven't yet used that dead bird, and as far as I know I still have it, so . . . Or actually, what I think would be fun for People who are Not Very Witty, you could dress up as a Hair Metal Band. Dress up as Journey, especially if you are going to a party at which there will be a lot of white chicks. That's enough writing about Halloween costumes. How is it that all day while driving around, I think about interesting things to write, and then when I actually sit down to write them, cannot remember what I was supposed to write? I did want to write about my career and where all of this is right now. I have more or less given up actually "practicing" law and converted to full time doing these mobile closings. Naturally, I cannot just do something because it simply makes sense; I have to ponder everything in great detail. I love doing the closings because it's simple and it pays well. I get a call, make a couple of calls, print out documents, fed ex them back, and I'm done. I do not have to deal with all the hassle of clients, or billing, or follow up, or battling with anything I do not know, like the terror of depositions and service and . . . the whole practice of law. I think had I had more/better training, I would feel differently, but I don't. I have learnt how to do a lot on my own but . . . all in all, would rather not. And yes, you can make a good deal of money in solo/semi-solo practice, but honestly, to do it effectively, you probably need an office (see need to move, above) and an assistant, and you need to advertise, and time you do all that, you are grossing more but netting something comparable, with a lot more work. That Madame Iron Butterfly didn't seem to be rolling in it, however, she certainly didn't want to share it with anyone. I'm making 6 figures and I frequently get to come home and take naps, and sometimes, if Mr. K. is at home, other recreational activities. I never have to sit through idiot meetings. I don't have a boss. I don't have co-workers. I don't have to get up (usually) at some idiot hour. MC was complaining about her job and saying that she was having trouble with billable hours and there was interpersonal drama at work and I'm thinking, I am having none of that. I have a feeling she may have been somewhat responsible for the interpersonal drama at work . . then again, perhaps not . . and then they made her take the North Carolina Bar, and she failed, and I would just die. One concern is that I might be selling myself short; I have thought about that. The world is full of people who want to be Clarence Darrow and will change the world or make a difference in people's lives. I've done that teaching. This is certainly not the most challenging thing in the world, and in some ways, it might be a waste of a law degree, but on the other hand . . . I am thinking back to what I HONESTLY, in my blackened, shriveled up little heart of hearts went to law school to do, and it was to Make Money and do something Less Stressful. And I'm doing that. I have enjoyed (almost all of) the cases I've worked on, but this is a much happier niche for me. I'm also thinking, if I really get bored, I can always restart the law practice. I'm not seeing getting bored with this though. I am, however, concerned about the closings drying up. So the most sensible thing for right now, at least, is be fiscally prudent and save some money while trying to get another house. That means paying less on my debt than I optimally could. But I'm going for that laser gazelle intensity that Dave Ramsey is always talking about in getting a house. Mr. K. and I are still getting to know each other. It's funny how in both of these situations, I'm happy . . . and at the same time on my guard that both the career and new gentleman friend could be whisked away at any time. In many ways, we are different people, but we are very attracted to each other . . . Cruella, you're mistaking lust for love again! I might be, and then on the other hand, the people I should have had more in common with on paper, never worked out either, so why the heck not. Might as well try. Everyone has their issues and for whatever reason, I'm really not meeting people who are more similar, so why not try someone different. How different is he? Well, I did discuss he is . . . husky, shall we say. Not so big as "Where's my Bukkit?" He also likes rap "music." O, are you going to get all George Will on us? Yes, I am. "Rap music" if you ask me is an oxymoron. I know that has been said before and often but ima say it again anyway. And I do not know and could not tell you if what Mr. K. likes to listen to is Rap or hip hop, but it is all horrible. I am going to lump it under the label of Rap and tell you that it is like having the shingles, which is extremely painful and utterly preventable. I can understand, having been exposed to it, why so many of those kids I was teaching thought they could be rappers; it takes absolutely no talent whatsoever, from what I can tell, to be a rapper. All you have to do is shout banalities about how other (n-bad word) are jealous of you and you don't give a (f-bad word) and then you smoke weed and ho's want you and you have lots of them. Then you get one of those cheapo electronic keyboards, made in some place below China, like Bhutan, and tinker on it and then reloop it and shout over it. Mr. K. is fond of one song which insists, over and over, "I'm going to work!" Go to work then, and begone, I think. I suppose the concept of working is so novel to these people that it seemed an inspired subject for a song. Frankly, I am not one of those people who "likes all kinds of music." As if y'all didn't already know. My idea of diverse musical tastes is to like Eurythmics AND solo Annie Lennox and solo Dave Stewart. If I get really adventurous, I like '80's pop and hair metal and Van Halen and classical music and opera. There are a few other things I like, but . . . Oh, and I have a story I think is funny for you. So Mr. K. wanted me to say a word to him while . . . but the problem is that I cannot say this word with any sort of real conviction, not practicing it regularly, so I sound like Dora the Explorer while saying it. He hasn't asked me again.