It is Plotting Again

That creature next door is Plotting Again. Sheridan complains at length about Ola, but Ola is not nearly as bad as Those Creatures; Ola is mad enough that the police can get involved and Do Something whereas in my situation, there is nothing I can do, except wait for whatever horrid thing to Happen and then try to deal with the consequences.

I hate living next to those inbred bastards. Frankly, if they sacrificed goats and were Satanists, I should prefer that. But Trey was outside today on the porch and he heard it plotting- it said something about well, I'm getting John (their brother who curses in an amusing manner) to take care of them.

So I am concerned about what is likely to happen. Arrrgh. As if my ulcer weren't active enough.

Today I spoke at length with Teri, meine ehenmaliger Deutsch Lehererin! (For you uncultured Swine, that means something you have to look up) At any rate, she is an attorney, one of the beautiful high-power sorts, and she gave me some advice to what I wanted to know.

You have to cut your hair, she said, and laughed in that way that makes me reconsider Trey-

O I know that, I said. Many, many people have told me that, and I am not willing to do it until necessary, but I do realise that.

She also told me Georgia State was not a good idea, because her firm didn't interview beyond the top 5-10 percent of the class, and other firms even fewer, and recommended UGA or University of Virginia, perhaps Emory.

Um, University of Virginia is wicked expensive, I checked, and you have to have a 3.67 and 172. I'm not so sure about those numbers. That's just as expensive as Emory, and I really want to get away from the Daddy-will-get-me-a-job-in-his-firm modality.

She explained as well what it is like to be a lawyer (I have no time off, she said, you can't take a real vacation. They OWN your mind all day. You can't mess up, because then everything's f*cked up.)

O, I said. Well, I'm already working like 70 hours a week, and I suppose it is not that stressful, but I hope Trey likes bald men because surely I shall lose the remainder of my soon-to-be-cut hair.

One advantage to this that I had not really considered is that for all of those people who feared the prospect of our adopting children and their having Two Daddies, I imagine I shall be working too much to have any deleterious effect upon the children. It will be a bit likc Curious George, they will have a daddy, and then a Man in a Suit who appears occasionally to prepare food and bitch.

Assassinated!

Things that have happened this week:
We have been aggressively marketing (by going on Craigslist) the extra room, in hopes of renting it. I am also painting the room a sort of beige colour. I don't care for this beige colour at all, but that was the only colour we had enough of in the basement. I would have preferred to paint it that peach colour again, but I didn't have enough of that kind of paint. It needed it, having been graffitied (I probably made up that word) by several people.

I bought 30 lbs of Cherries from Wal-Mart (hey, they were 98 cents a pound) to make beer with, a kind called "Cherries in the Snow" which is supposed to require sour cherries, but I will make do with what I have-

Trey did NOT eat the raw potato, for those of you anxious to find out what the outcome was.

O and we watched Margaret Cho's latest attempt at comedy, "Assassin."

Miss Cho takes herself WAY too seriously for someone who achieved, according to her own admission, a 0.2 GPA in high school. Why or how she set herself up as a political pundit I do not know, but her "comedy" has turned into little better than an extended version of Orwell's 3 minute hate, constructively directed at the Bush administration. (note sarcasm, for the sarcasm impaired) (Alex)

I wonder why I should take political advice from someone who spent a fair number of years snorting every white powder that came to their house in an envelope (her own words).

I wonder why I should take political advice from someone who, instead of graduating high school or going to college, was coming down off of crystal meth and was so drunk she had to hang on to the mike stand to perform. (again, her own words)

I wonder why I should listen to the political opinions of someone who spent their formative years playing drinking games while watching "The Love Boat," i"Charlie's Angels," and "Soul Train" nstead of, you know, reading and absorbing knowledge.

I wonder why I should listen to someone who shrieks that Bush is a fascist, etc, while at the same time telling me that because I am gay I can ONLY vote for one party. Isn't that fascistic?

Doesn't she claim to oppose the unholy mingling of impersonal politics and personal relationships? She claims to oppose stereotypes and racism, but reinforces them herself through identity politics. Because I'm any kind of minority, I have to vote ONLY for one party. There isn't supposed to be a rational thought process considering who could best lead the country or represent me.

She attacks Republicans for being against gay marriage -
Margaret, that's not why Bush won. And you may not have been sober long enough to notice, but John Kerry too was against gay marriage. See the debates. They had IDENTICAL positions on the issue.

And I'm not sure how you get off on criticising the U.S. when in places like Latvia, people throw excrement on the Pride Marchers, and as far as I know, they weren't even listening to Mariah the Antichrist. I have my own issues with Bush, (no! Not like that! Ha ha I made a funny) but they need to be articulated. I suppose he failed to cut government spending doesn't really make for good stand up, but then again, politics should be left out.

Also in her "comedy" she was very proud of some kind of March for Women's Lives that she had something or other to do with. Of course, I did not hear about this, so I don't think it had very much impact. But what IS it with liberals? They seem to think that if you just get enough people together and make a lot of noise, Something is Happening. Yes! By etting all these women together and Marching, we are Changing the World. People are Getting the Message. All that We are the World, let's get a bunch of rockers to sing and buy our record and have big concerts, because, you know, that like Raises Consciousness or something.

If it were true that getting bunches of people together accomplished anything, sheep would rule the earth, or at least Montana.

I don't remember how long ago it was, but it was fairly recently, there were all these concerts all across the globe for some kind fo AIDS benefit, and Bono and Annie Lennox and a bunch of other people who should shut up and make music participated. I'm sure they raised lots and lots of money and all went home smugly self satisfied that they Made a Difference.

Hogwash. Where did the money go? If it were doing some good, surely we would hear as much about what they spent it on as how they were raising it. Honestly, AIDS isn't really a problem which can be solved by throwing money at it. AIDS can be solved by not fucking people with HIV. Ok?

I suppose it makes liberals feel all Better and they get that gooey-warm feeling of accomplishment, like the kind of feeling I get when I fix the car. The difference is that when I fix the car, it has accomplished something, but when liberals do things like this, it doesn't really do anything, like teaching kids at Tri-Cities. You're going through all the motions, everything looks good, but there aren't any results.

Besides, I don't want Miss Cho to provide us with political commentary, and I don't want Annie Lennox to do that either. Annie Lennox should sing and play the piano, and Margaret Cho should go back to talking about Ass Master and My-Name-Is_Gwen-And-I'm-Here-To-WAAAARRRRRSH-Your-Vagina!

Do you really want to hear, for example, Lady Thatcher sing "Why?' Do you want to hear Tony Blair do stand-up?

That's what I thought.

Why Trey is STILL not allowed to cook

Yesterday Trey showed me what he packed for lunch. He was very proud of it.

I have two peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, he said some carrots, and a raw potato - - -

This last set off alarm bells in my head. You're going to eat a RAW potato? I asked, horrified.

Yes, said Trey, What's wrong with that?

You can't eat raw potatoes! I exclaimed. It will make you sick!

Oh he said. Why will it make you sick?

The starch is indigestible, I think, I said (I really don't know why one cannot eat raw potatoes but I've always heard they will give you a stomachache) . Hve you eaten it before?

Yes! he says. There's nothing wrong with it!

Kiddies, this is why Trey is not allowed to cook. Anyone would think that after 5 years of my excellent cuisine and so forth, he would have some conception of what constitutes edible food and what doesn't. Anyone would think after years and years and years working in the restaurant industry, he would realise that no one, ever, anywhere, is served raw potatoes. Well, I suppose one of the exciting things about living with Trey is that you never really know what to expect; he is full of surprises.

Car Talk

http://www.autoblog.com/2006/07/07/the-ultimate-kei-mitsubishi-i-hello-kitty-princess-kitty-edit/

I thought everyone should see this; this seems like a good way to solve some of Mitsubishi's marketing woes in America. I can think of several of my students who would buy a Hello Kitty car. Guys couldn't come within 10 feet of it, though, without having serious sexuality issues.

In other Car news, GM is about to be bought by Renault/Nissan. The claim is that they are "entering talks" but realistically- GM is probably at the bankruptcy/sale decision point. Some of their cars are selling well enough to keep them afloat but not for much longer.

The trucks, in particular, probably aren't selling well enough to justify GM's recent massive expenditures. But they're some of the strongest products that GM has-

It's hard to see at first glance what Renault/Nissan gets out of this other than that they really don't compete with GM directly in a lot of markets, except for GM's small European cars. at first glance, Honda or Toyota would seem to be a better purchaser, particularly Honda because the Acura brand has struggled so much in recent years and GM has RWD experience and can provide Honda with necessary luxury platforms, as well as trucks which Honda seems to need. Also GM has been very successful in China where I don't believe Honda is nearly as successful.

Toyota's lineup is noticeably lacking in passion; They could buy GM just for the successful Truck lines and the Corvette and throw the rest away.

Actually, I think the best buyers for GM/Ford would be one of these Chinese car companies. Both GM and Ford have established dealer networks and established brands; Buick, for example, is like the no 1 seller in China as well. The Chinese would have to otherwise build brands and that takes a long time and a lot of expense. There are so many failed brands that have tried to establish themselves recently in the last 10 years, does anyone remember Daihatsu? Their cars were OK but the lack of a dealer network and established brand killed them.

Anyway, I will have to resume this at a later post- - -

Happenings!

I can't say that there have been many very Exciting Happenings of late, so really if you don't read this you aren't missing anything.

How is that for an honest disclaimer? Right up front, too! Oh, wait, I have to add ANOTHER disclaimer- Some people are likely to be offended by something or other I write. To paraphrase Abraham Lincoln, You're likely to offend All of the people some of the time, Some of the people all of the time, but you probably can't offend All of the people All of the time.

After long periods of debate on exactly what sort of whore I am- Trey has proposed several different things, among them: Lying Whore, Twinkle Whore, and Eeeing Whore. I do not lie so I do not know why he thinks I'm a lying whore. I suppose I twinkle- I think it's an attractive Idea. Don't YOU want to be a Twinkle Whore? That would make a good name for a perfume. I do say Eeee!

But I have discovered that I am: A Beach Whore. I will go with ANYONE to the beach: I would probably go with Jeffrey Dahmer; I would just make sure that I overfilled the fridge and freezer once I got there so he could not cut me up and put me in the freezer.

I went to the Beach AGAIN with Cathy! We went to Seacrest, which is near Destin/Panama City but there weren't any teenagers, which was fine with me. Of course Trey did not go. Cathy, despite her occasional protests to the contrary, does not like Trey. Her mother also went; I have never previously spent time around her mother, so I did not know what that would be like. Initially, I was doubtful as to whether or not I should go but then I decided to try it.

It was a LOT of fun, as always; the beach was Beautiful! One thing that Cathy did that I did not like very much was reapply lipstick while driving- this would not have bothered me except that it did have a detrimental effect on her driving. We ate really great food, and stayed in this "cottage"- it's about the Size of a cottage, but not really what I would consider a cottage, it was easily the fanciest of all the places we have stayed in- it had granite countertops and a plasma TV and was completely new. This cottage- there were several others for sale in the neighbourhood- cost probably 650K for a two bedroom two bath. Now while we were there- the lady who OWNED it came up to us and said- O I wanted to meet you! She owned that cottage, she said, but it turned out to be too small, with the kids and all, so they bought another one in the same neighbourhood. We were some of the first renters.

The mind boggles. At least, my mind does, because as of the 14th of this month, I had 35.00 in my checking account despite not having spent any notable sums on anything, and I shan't get paid again until the first- and this lady owns at least 1.4 mil of property RIGHT THERE. I keep wondering when I see a Beach house with a Plasma TV what their Real houses look like. This lady said they lived off of Moore's Mill. Now the Paulinos did at one time live up in that Area but I imagine she is not living in Hollywood road apartments. She must live somewhere near the governor's mansion. I shouldn't get all Freddy and be impressed by lavish displays of probably inherited wealth but I really can't help it. I'm sure they must own multiple properties and have lots and lots of money; This impresses me- because it's taking me until August to pay off last winter's gas bill, and the house isn't even warm.

I wish I had had a camera as well, because I would have liked to have taken some pictures of the hallucinatory style of architecture that exists there. This place, by the way, is called Seacrest/Seagrove/Grayton Beach and by now most of the old Florida cottages- the real cottages, not the fakey Craftsman types like the one we stayed in- have given way to this Tim-Burton-in=bright-colours style. Like if you took the Edward Scissorhands houses and blew them all up huge. It's like a tract house and a New Orleans Victorian and an Italian Villa all got together and had bastard grandchildren. One town was completely stark white concrete, and I don't know what that says for race relations in our time (you can build an entirely white town?) but it says something.

Oh and that horrible roommate John left, he apparently found some chick who was willing to take care of him in Florida so he got on the bus, Gus. Thank GOD.
Let me tell you the kinds of things he did, lest I forget in future.
John actually fell for that Nigerian internet scam. I get those things, and I think, who in this day and age is dumb enough to fall for that? Well, he was, and then he didn't want to go to work because of this massive check he was going to receive. I had to threaten him EVERY WEEK to make him get up and go to work to pay the rent. He also would not go to work independently but had to be gotten up and driven by Trey. Then he wouldn't give Trey gas money and bickered with him all the time. That is precisely what I am trying to get away from during the summer, adolescents bickering.
He sat on the computer day and night. He used our telephones constantly.
He didn't have any sense of privacy like if the bedroom door is closed DON'T bother us! No I will NOT go to the car and get you a cigarette! Don't bother us!
He wouldn't pick up after himself and refused to lift a finger around the house.

I am not prepared, or interested, in bringing up other people's adolescent children whom I do not love. I have enough to deal with with Trey without another one, who lacks Trey's charming personality and interesting- - - well, you know Trey is interesting. Sorry. I miss Steve, he was so nice and cooperative. We do need another housemate- but I want an adult, not a child.

And Trey got a JOB, which given our combined efforts was hardly a surprise-upon my return from Florida I told him he needed to get a Sunday paper so we could look for him a job. Trye had a fit. But I made him, and then we prayed about it, so now he is driving a truck for Masada Bakery. This is also a warning, in case you see a Masada Bakery truck. This job pays $10 an hour to start but with raises up to $16 and full benefits, and about 60 hours a week. I am so happy.

I also have almost figured out what I want to write for my personal statement for Law School- I decided that the reasons I want to go to law school are to Make Money Kick Ass and Take Names. So I thought that the most palatable of those to focus on was Kick Ass, and I am going with a theme from a children's book fondly remembered from Childhood, Last One Home Is A Green Pig. Suffice it to say that the theme I will be developing will be that I don't want to be a Green Pig. I think that will be attention getting, different, and paint the picture of myself that would ensure my acceptance.

I fixed my dad's car yesterday, the mode switch for the HVAC was broken. Yes! I did something MANLY! Fie on all you doubters! With the help of an online forum, I found out a vacuum hose was broken, and where, and I spliced it together.

Very Short: Another Thing Trey Did!

I know that most people's opinion of Trey differs sharply from mine; But I do not, obviously, care what they think; how can you not be entertained by someone who drinks beer and then makes up really absurd songs? And then wants to kill Igor Stravinsky.

Also, the other day we had to go to the petrol station, which I think is some sort of passive-aggressive behaviour on his part- and what question does he ask? He was looking at the pump, and contemplating it, observed that there was a reading for how much petrol he had bought in dollars, how much he had bought in gallons, and then below that was another number which was incomprehensible to him.

That's the PRICE, you twat, I said. He was surprised that the price of each gallon was indicated on the pump. I wonder what it would be like to experience reality as Trey for one day.